Friday, January 28, 2011
Moved to the mountains
I moved to Pinedale, Wyoming when I got a job offer at the Sublette Examiner as a reporter. Normally I wouldn't move 1,000 miles away from home without knowing someone in the area...but the 7200 ft elevation was too tempting to pass up for improving my running and learning how to snowboard.
My new job rocks, the office is loaded with mac computers, my coworkers are awesome and I got permission to make comics for the paper in addition to my regular reporting load. (One step closer to obtaining national syndication as a cartoonist...suck it, art school!)
Things were totally epic for this first few days.
Then I hit a freaking deer and totaled my car! A stupid suicidal deer on the other side of the highway jumped out in front of me and my only options were to swerve into oncoming traffic, go off the side of a mountain or hit the stupid jerk.
Not wanting to die, I hit the freak and drove 18 miles through the mountains at night with no headlight or passenger window. Fan-freaking-tastic.
I was so mad at that deer that I promptly broke my vegetarianism and ate a deer burger out of vengeance.
[Girlfriend] and I named my 2001 Daewoo "Appa" last summer because I bought it at the peak of our Avatar obsession (the anime series, not the blue freaks) . Daewoo was only made for a few years and then the company tanked...so parts are rare and expensive even though the car is cheap.
Fun fact of the day: Gigantic Wyoming deer love to kill cheap Korean cars.
So, I was 1,000 miles from home, new in town and fresh out of college with no income yet since my first pay day was 5 days away. There was no freaking way any bank would hook me up with a car loan without my parents as a co-signer...and I thought I was an adult. Guess not!
Fortunately, the people here are extremely nice and the local car dealer hooked me up with a crazy nice loaner truck until we could get me in something new. Despite all this, I was freaked!
After a week of begging the banks in Wyoming to hook me up with a loan, I ended up going with my hometown bank back in Iowa since they knew me well enough to know that screwing me over with high interest rates would be totally bogus.
My new ride is boss. In fact, I might go so far as to say is soooo cash.
I'm a diehard fan of "Kill Bill" and an alumni of the University of Iowa, so anything that is black and gold must be mine. I named her Uma (after Uma Thurman, my favorite actress who coincidentally looks a lot like [Girlfriend]).
My coworkers and friends reactions to my car crash were pretty similar...and it was a pretty good blow to my recently inflated ego. Yay karma!
Jacie is one of my chillest coworkers, so I drew her in my first comic to get printed in a newspaper since college.
[Since Pinedale is way up in the mountains, there are tons of moose here...so I grew a beard. Deal with it.]
So Appa is dead and I got a car loan in addition to my student loans to pay off...but it's worth it.
Doubt me? Best check yourself, fool, because I don't front...much.
Ch-ch-check this view out, cousin!
Living and training up here is improving my running in ways that never could have happened in Iowa. The thin air, massive mountains and awesome aquatic center across the street from my house is totally getting me ready for the 2012 Canadian Death Race. (77 miles in less than 24 hours over 3 mountain peaks).
You all knew I was insane, and this is the extent of my madness.
My new job rocks, the office is loaded with mac computers, my coworkers are awesome and I got permission to make comics for the paper in addition to my regular reporting load. (One step closer to obtaining national syndication as a cartoonist...suck it, art school!)
Things were totally epic for this first few days.
Then I hit a freaking deer and totaled my car! A stupid suicidal deer on the other side of the highway jumped out in front of me and my only options were to swerve into oncoming traffic, go off the side of a mountain or hit the stupid jerk.
Not wanting to die, I hit the freak and drove 18 miles through the mountains at night with no headlight or passenger window. Fan-freaking-tastic.
I was so mad at that deer that I promptly broke my vegetarianism and ate a deer burger out of vengeance.
[Girlfriend] and I named my 2001 Daewoo "Appa" last summer because I bought it at the peak of our Avatar obsession (the anime series, not the blue freaks) . Daewoo was only made for a few years and then the company tanked...so parts are rare and expensive even though the car is cheap.
Fun fact of the day: Gigantic Wyoming deer love to kill cheap Korean cars.
So, I was 1,000 miles from home, new in town and fresh out of college with no income yet since my first pay day was 5 days away. There was no freaking way any bank would hook me up with a car loan without my parents as a co-signer...and I thought I was an adult. Guess not!
Fortunately, the people here are extremely nice and the local car dealer hooked me up with a crazy nice loaner truck until we could get me in something new. Despite all this, I was freaked!
After a week of begging the banks in Wyoming to hook me up with a loan, I ended up going with my hometown bank back in Iowa since they knew me well enough to know that screwing me over with high interest rates would be totally bogus.
My new ride is boss. In fact, I might go so far as to say is soooo cash.
I'm a diehard fan of "Kill Bill" and an alumni of the University of Iowa, so anything that is black and gold must be mine. I named her Uma (after Uma Thurman, my favorite actress who coincidentally looks a lot like [Girlfriend]).
My coworkers and friends reactions to my car crash were pretty similar...and it was a pretty good blow to my recently inflated ego. Yay karma!
Jacie is one of my chillest coworkers, so I drew her in my first comic to get printed in a newspaper since college.
[Since Pinedale is way up in the mountains, there are tons of moose here...so I grew a beard. Deal with it.]
So Appa is dead and I got a car loan in addition to my student loans to pay off...but it's worth it.
Doubt me? Best check yourself, fool, because I don't front...much.
Ch-ch-check this view out, cousin!
Living and training up here is improving my running in ways that never could have happened in Iowa. The thin air, massive mountains and awesome aquatic center across the street from my house is totally getting me ready for the 2012 Canadian Death Race. (77 miles in less than 24 hours over 3 mountain peaks).
You all knew I was insane, and this is the extent of my madness.
Labels:
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
Best Day Ever
I would have made some drawings for this update, but moving day is tomorrow. Deal with it, punk. (I will definitely be posting new blog/comics once I get settled into my new place though, so be excited.)
Today has been the best day ever. EVER.
Never before in the history of mankind, nor even during the duration of this plane of existence, has anyone had a better day than I had today. Be jelly.
1. I'm finally leaving my boring/smelly/depressing hometown tomorrow to start my first job-that-is-related-to-my-college-degree-and-is-something-I-actually-want-to-do job. Ooh yes, I am thrilled.
2. My great-grandma royally hooked me up with a ton of her frosted sugar cookies...to go along with the mountain of junk food my sister got me and the amazing DING DONGS WITH OREO FILLING that my ex-student/soon-to-be-protege made for me (if the dudes at the newspaper ever get their junk together and let her take my spot as columnist/film critic).
...if you can't tell by now from the frantic tone of my writing, I have been eating those snacks all day while packing and am on a sugar rush which is probably on the verge of becoming a food coma.
Also, you read right, Ding Dongs with Oreo Filling. Try it, it will change your perspective on snacking forever. FOREVER. (There is a reason why I chose [student] as my replacement at the newspaper, she is a genius at snacks and that's 90% of the writing process right there. Don't believe me? Note the dietary habits of Hemmingway, Mark Twain, and just about any good writer and you will find that they ate some odd-yet-amazing things.)
Anyway!
3. The iPhone is going to be available on Verizon soon. I am so stoked. I've wanted one for years, and I could care less about the other smart phones. The iPhone is shiny and made by Apple, therefore I need it. (Actually I just like how it looks and works when compared to other phones and could care less about expanding memory and all that other crap. It's a freaking cell phone, not a customizable car or desktop computer...so no whining about the Android, you harpies!)
4. Boxxy is back. She is my favorite internet meme (or whatever you want to call her/her character), and I can't wait to see her new videos!
If you don't know who I am talking about, watch this!
If your head didn't melt from that first video and you want to know more, watch this!
If you know who I am talking about, but don't believe me that she is back, watch this!
5. I just now realized that one of my old friends from Hapkido recently started teaching at Utah State University, and that is only a 3.5 hour drive from where I will be! It's going to rock hanging out with her again, and it's just comforting to know there is a friend nearby.
6. Today is Pocky Day. 1-11-11 (Pocky are delicious Japanese cookie sticks, and since they look like 1's, each day that is entirely made of 1's is a Pocky Day. I could only find strawberry around here, so I had to settle...but it was still delicious!)
Summary of today: Woot!
Today has been the best day ever. EVER.
Never before in the history of mankind, nor even during the duration of this plane of existence, has anyone had a better day than I had today. Be jelly.
1. I'm finally leaving my boring/smelly/depressing hometown tomorrow to start my first job-that-is-related-to-my-college-degree-and-is-something-I-actually-want-to-do job. Ooh yes, I am thrilled.
2. My great-grandma royally hooked me up with a ton of her frosted sugar cookies...to go along with the mountain of junk food my sister got me and the amazing DING DONGS WITH OREO FILLING that my ex-student/soon-to-be-protege made for me (if the dudes at the newspaper ever get their junk together and let her take my spot as columnist/film critic).
...if you can't tell by now from the frantic tone of my writing, I have been eating those snacks all day while packing and am on a sugar rush which is probably on the verge of becoming a food coma.
Also, you read right, Ding Dongs with Oreo Filling. Try it, it will change your perspective on snacking forever. FOREVER. (There is a reason why I chose [student] as my replacement at the newspaper, she is a genius at snacks and that's 90% of the writing process right there. Don't believe me? Note the dietary habits of Hemmingway, Mark Twain, and just about any good writer and you will find that they ate some odd-yet-amazing things.)
Anyway!
3. The iPhone is going to be available on Verizon soon. I am so stoked. I've wanted one for years, and I could care less about the other smart phones. The iPhone is shiny and made by Apple, therefore I need it. (Actually I just like how it looks and works when compared to other phones and could care less about expanding memory and all that other crap. It's a freaking cell phone, not a customizable car or desktop computer...so no whining about the Android, you harpies!)
4. Boxxy is back. She is my favorite internet meme (or whatever you want to call her/her character), and I can't wait to see her new videos!
If you don't know who I am talking about, watch this!
If your head didn't melt from that first video and you want to know more, watch this!
If you know who I am talking about, but don't believe me that she is back, watch this!
5. I just now realized that one of my old friends from Hapkido recently started teaching at Utah State University, and that is only a 3.5 hour drive from where I will be! It's going to rock hanging out with her again, and it's just comforting to know there is a friend nearby.
6. Today is Pocky Day. 1-11-11 (Pocky are delicious Japanese cookie sticks, and since they look like 1's, each day that is entirely made of 1's is a Pocky Day. I could only find strawberry around here, so I had to settle...but it was still delicious!)
Summary of today: Woot!
Friday, December 31, 2010
The (un)update
I haven't forgotten about updating, it's just been a busy month. All that time I spent job hunting really paid off!
1. I got a job at a car dealership that involved commuting an hour there and back. (It sucked)
2. I got a job offer from a newspaper in Wyoming. (Can you say snowboarding!?!)
3. I quit the car dealership after only working there for two weeks, I didn't want to waste their time training me for a job I was never going to do. (I did a happy dance.)
Right about here is when I should have began drawing comic/blogs again. But no, reality got in the way!
4. I bought Christmas presents, wrapped them up and gave them to the peeps. (Giving is awesome, debt is not.)
5. I got a stomach virus. (It made my butt hurt for 4 days.)
6. I acquired space bags and spent much time sucking the air out of my stuff so I can fit it all in my car for the move to Wyoming. (I am an ADULT.)
I promise I will start updating with drawings and stories for you soon and here's why you can trust me on this:
I spent $70 on a drawing tablet and I hate wasting money, so I will use it until I've melted it from drawing so much.
Happy 2011! ...If I never update again, just assume I was mauled by a bear or moose while running in the mountains.
1. I got a job at a car dealership that involved commuting an hour there and back. (It sucked)
2. I got a job offer from a newspaper in Wyoming. (Can you say snowboarding!?!)
3. I quit the car dealership after only working there for two weeks, I didn't want to waste their time training me for a job I was never going to do. (I did a happy dance.)
Right about here is when I should have began drawing comic/blogs again. But no, reality got in the way!
4. I bought Christmas presents, wrapped them up and gave them to the peeps. (Giving is awesome, debt is not.)
5. I got a stomach virus. (It made my butt hurt for 4 days.)
6. I acquired space bags and spent much time sucking the air out of my stuff so I can fit it all in my car for the move to Wyoming. (I am an ADULT.)
I promise I will start updating with drawings and stories for you soon and here's why you can trust me on this:
I spent $70 on a drawing tablet and I hate wasting money, so I will use it until I've melted it from drawing so much.
Happy 2011! ...If I never update again, just assume I was mauled by a bear or moose while running in the mountains.
Wednesday, December 8, 2010
How to prepare for a Marathon
Sorry for the lack of updates the last few days. I have a valid excuse though, I got a big boy job!
So, you want to know how to run a marathon, huh? You've been running at least 5 miles a day EVERYDAY for the past few months and you think you are ready to take on something that most people can't even imagine doing!?!
Good for you, have a cookie!
Seriously.
You need carbs. Eat a cookie right now!
Everyone else, if you are curious about how to prepare for a marathon I suggest checking with sites made by professional runners or physical therapists, because trying to run this far without conditioning your body and mind for it can be quite damaging. (Also, because I'm an idiot and I built up to this point over years of adding more distance and reading random articles on running.)
The night before running a marathon it is absotively posolutely imperative to your survival that you eat lots of carbs and drink lots of water. Carbs are energy, which you will need a lot of once you start going the next day. Organic cheese pizza is the perfect food for vegetarian marathon runners to eat the night before a long run. Cheese is loaded with protein, and sauce (white or red) is delicious and has some vitamins, and the crust is delicious carbs. If you want to go hardcore-awesome, top that bad boy off with some noodles and you will be in carbohydrate heaven!
I'm not being immature (well maybe I am a little bit), but you are going to piss like a mo-fo. Just sit your candy ass down on the toilet while eating and chugging water because you will be going peeing so much that your piss would count a purified water.
Feels goooooood, man.
Next, you freaking DIE!!!
Close enough anyway, a food coma will hit right around the time your pee-hole starts to go numb from all the pissing. This won't be the best sleep ever, but a food coma is a pretty deep sleep...which makes it fantastic for being well rested for the running!
YAAAAAY SLEEP!!!
Once you emerge from your food coma, you will have to poop really badly. But that's too bad for you because you need to eat some motha-freakin' oatmeal, cousin!
Oatmeal is great for a last meal, it is small and gives long lasting energy without making you feel bloated and slow.
Also, drink more water.
Now that all those carbs are digested and you are well hydrated, it is time to get pissed off!
[sqwee! This is the fun part!]
Think of the worst possible things your mind can come up with. Things that really infuriate you. (Here's a few to get you started since sinister thoughts aren't something normal people think about too often. ...though, you are reading my blog and that makes you suspicious already. O___O)
Anger helps psyche you up and get you focused. Maybe you can prevent all those things from happening if you run fast enough? (Maybe a magical cupcake will appear on my desk while I go get my headphones from downstairs...who knows?)
Angry music might not necessarily be your favorite music, but it keeps the adrenaline pumping. I don't necessarily like angry music, but certain sounds, rhythms and lyrics really freak me out and tap my adrenaline.
I highly recommend the following bands (and these songs in particular) for running any distance:
*Applause*
So, you want to know how to run a marathon, huh? You've been running at least 5 miles a day EVERYDAY for the past few months and you think you are ready to take on something that most people can't even imagine doing!?!
Good for you, have a cookie!
Seriously.
You need carbs. Eat a cookie right now!
Everyone else, if you are curious about how to prepare for a marathon I suggest checking with sites made by professional runners or physical therapists, because trying to run this far without conditioning your body and mind for it can be quite damaging. (Also, because I'm an idiot and I built up to this point over years of adding more distance and reading random articles on running.)
The night before running a marathon it is absotively posolutely imperative to your survival that you eat lots of carbs and drink lots of water. Carbs are energy, which you will need a lot of once you start going the next day. Organic cheese pizza is the perfect food for vegetarian marathon runners to eat the night before a long run. Cheese is loaded with protein, and sauce (white or red) is delicious and has some vitamins, and the crust is delicious carbs. If you want to go hardcore-awesome, top that bad boy off with some noodles and you will be in carbohydrate heaven!
I'm not being immature (well maybe I am a little bit), but you are going to piss like a mo-fo. Just sit your candy ass down on the toilet while eating and chugging water because you will be going peeing so much that your piss would count a purified water.
Feels goooooood, man.
Next, you freaking DIE!!!
Close enough anyway, a food coma will hit right around the time your pee-hole starts to go numb from all the pissing. This won't be the best sleep ever, but a food coma is a pretty deep sleep...which makes it fantastic for being well rested for the running!
YAAAAAY SLEEP!!!
Once you emerge from your food coma, you will have to poop really badly. But that's too bad for you because you need to eat some motha-freakin' oatmeal, cousin!
Oatmeal is great for a last meal, it is small and gives long lasting energy without making you feel bloated and slow.
Also, drink more water.
Now that all those carbs are digested and you are well hydrated, it is time to get pissed off!
[sqwee! This is the fun part!]
Think of the worst possible things your mind can come up with. Things that really infuriate you. (Here's a few to get you started since sinister thoughts aren't something normal people think about too often. ...though, you are reading my blog and that makes you suspicious already. O___O)
- A loved one being killed and the murderer getting away with it!
- Everyone you know and loved is being raped, tortured and slowly/mercilessly killed right now and there is nothing you can do about it! (Except run really far and really fast!)
- Heat seeking missiles are flying directly at you and everyone you care about! You have to outrun them to save everybody!
- Puppies are being set on fire and kittens are being microwaved!
- There's no toilet paper left in the whole restroom and nobody bothered to re-fill it and now you are stuck with a nasty ass and your cellphone is dead!
Get. Pissed. Off.
Anger helps psyche you up and get you focused. Maybe you can prevent all those things from happening if you run fast enough? (Maybe a magical cupcake will appear on my desk while I go get my headphones from downstairs...who knows?)
Angry music might not necessarily be your favorite music, but it keeps the adrenaline pumping. I don't necessarily like angry music, but certain sounds, rhythms and lyrics really freak me out and tap my adrenaline.
I highly recommend the following bands (and these songs in particular) for running any distance:
- Incubus - A Certain Shade of Green
- Finch - Insomniac Meat
- Rage Against The Machine - Killing in the name of (Bonus points of awesomeness if you scream along with the entire song in public with complete sincerity and gusto.)
- The Offspring - You're Gonna Go Far, Kid
- My Chemical Romance - Destroya (Bonus points of awesomeness if you scream "You don't believe in God! I don't believe in luck! They don't believe in us! But I believe in the enemy!" while sprinting as fast as you can.)
- From Autumn to Ashes - The After Dinner Payback
- Linkin Park - Given Up
- Marilyn Manson - The Fight Song
- Mindless Self Indulgence - Bring The Pain (Method Man Cover)
- Flyleaf - Perfect
- Maximum the Hormone - What's Up, People?
- Rammstein - Mein Teil
- Seether - F*ck It
- Lady Gaga - Bad Romance
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About Me
- Matt
- I got my English degree and mountain of student loan debt from the University of Iowa. I like boo berry cereal, martial arts, running and cats.
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